Malta survival guide

1. Wait for summer to dry washed clothes.

2. No need for indoor heating…it’s enough to go outside and sEe it’s at least 5 degrees hotter than in your house.

3. Noodles. Your best friend, as you don’t use electricity to cook them and after a couple of months, I’m pretty sure they will seem like a gourmet meal. Well, especially if you’re tired of crackers.

4. At some point mould will seem like the high art decoration of your living space. Probably after too many nights out in wonderful Paceville, but anyways…see the light at the end of the tunnel(don’t switch it on though, electricity cards are a bitch).

5. You will learn maltese very fast, especially if you need to deal with service providers. You will also learn that YOU provide the service and ALSO pay for it:)

6. Drinking and driving is mandatory here…so traffic becomes more understandable.

7. You will probably be known by more pleople than you actually know. It’s a kind of stalking, to a larger and less sinister extent. Kinda like Facebook.

8. To seem seem unintimidated, men will actually insult you and then expect you to be attracted to them. Go figure.

9. If you’re pretty, you will be invited to Gozo. A lot. If you’re not, you will be invited to Gozo anyway.

10. All in all, Malta is a wonderful and highly cultural experience. Especially if you give it a chance. Historically rich, awarded with the St. George’s Cross of Honour, filled with amazing and very friendly people, it will offer you all you look for.:) So don’t take my irony seriosly. Much love all


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